Sunday, July 7, 2013

Real Life Adventures In Construction - Injury Report (... a continuing series ...)


Let's take a look at the "Owie Count" during construction so far, shall we?

10: Various shin injuries amounting to more than a bump but less then a skin tear (results in a bruise at the very least)
1: Attempts at a finger stopping a 9 foot door from closing by jamming it into the lintel
12: Need for Band-Aids
4: Wooden splinters being shoved unceremoniously beneath fingernails
14: Various slips and falls
2: Collapsed scaffolding incidents from insufficient construction resulting in injury to pride rather than to body
4: Twisted wrists from improper use or holding tools
5: Trowel injuries resulting in cuts
7: Blisters
2: Slips on wet concrete
3: Need for Bactine / Neosporin / hydrogen peroxide
4: Falls off ladders
1: Drywall patches falling out of a ceiling and onto the head from not being properly attached
3: Kitchen incidents as a result of preparing food
3: Scrapes from 2x4s resulting in blood flow
5: Smashed knuckles as a result of yanking nails out of walls
11: Incidents of debris being dropped or blown into eyes necessitating brief work stoppages
innumerable: Assaults on the ears due to epithets being yelled out
4: Overly loud sneezes almost resulting in falling off a ladder or scaffold
1: Incidents of heavy machinery throwing someone against a wall, almost tearing off a leg and splaying an individual prone on the floor
1: Deep cuts to the leg as a result of a tile scraping machine's razor-sharp blade
2: Electrical shocks
0: Fatalities (So far so good)

Oh ... don't worry: Tile installation is coming up soon. There's sure to be plenty of injuries during that phase of construction.

.......... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Real Life Adventures In Construction - The Jealous Socks (... a continuing series ...)



Thursday late afternoon - the day's duties complete - we were "in the midst of a meeting" on the back porch with a couple cold beers being nursed. I brought out stale pita chips and guacamole to compliment our refreshment. We sat and talked about what was on tap the tomorrow.

I was the first to get my butt into the shower so we could venture out to dinner. Little did I know I was supposed to be the keeper of the foodstuffs. (I mean ... I brought out the chips and dip. I was supposed to put them away, too?)

Later that evening, I was informed the dip was not put back in the refrigerator; it was left out. 

And it was left out all night as it turned out. Outside. On the patio. All through the 89° night. To turn into congeelee. Great.

Fast forward to the next morning. I got up, made coffee and went out to the patio with my first cup. There was a bowl atop the guacamole. Steve had placed it there to ward off any flies that might come by to sample the stuff. Commendable of him to do so ... but, again, neither of us had remembered to put it back the night before. I lifted the bowl, but I didn't see the plastic container the guacamole was in. What the ... ?!?? Then I realized it was stuck to the bottom of the bowl. I lifted the bowl higher realizing the container was attached. And as I did so it fell onto the table, bounced off and tumbled to the ground while depositing half its contents into my left shoe with more splattering on the ground. Most of it, though, went my way. 

Warm, drippy guacamole slid directly into my shoe. Terrific. 6:15 in the morning, the day hadn't even started and I was already a mess. *sigh*

I mopped up as best I could. I got most of the goop out, decided I was clean enough and that it wasn't worth changing socks. After all I was going to be mixing and applying texture all day. I'd be a mess anyway.

Fast forward an hour later. 

Texture mixing was under way. It can be a messy job. Long story short? The over-sized drill with the heavy-duty mixing blade attached shot a load of gray gunk out of the 5 gallon container it was being mixed in ... and arced a perfect trajectory into my right shoe. 

Seriously?

My right sock and shoe were that jealous of the left shoe's guac sock they needed attention, too? Come on ...




.......... Ruprecht ( STOP )